Best man speech template: the 5 parts, with a full example
Who you are, one story, what it proves, the partner, the toast. 3 to 4 minutes. Example lines for every part and a whole sample speech.
The short answer
A best man speech is five parts in a fixed order: who you are, one story about the groom, what the story says about him, what the partner changed, and the toast. Three to four minutes, about 500 words, read out loud. Fill the template below with your own stories and it works.
The template, part by part
1. Who you are (30 seconds)
Your name, how you know the groom, how long. One light line is enough. The room wants to place you, not laugh yet.
“For those who don’t know me, I’m Tom, Dave’s best man. We have been friends since we were twelve.”
2. One story about the groom (60 to 90 seconds)
Pick a story only you can tell, that shows what he is like, and that his grandmother can hear. Tell it with the small true details: the place, what he said, what happened next. One story told well beats five told badly.
“He traded me his whole packed lunch for one pencil. Not a good pencil. A chewed one.”
3. What the story says about him (30 seconds)
Say the thing the story proves. This is the line people repeat afterwards. Keep it plain.
“Dave had just done what Dave always does: he gave someone more than they asked for and never mentioned it again.”
4. What the partner changed (45 to 60 seconds)
Turn to the partner. How they met, what you noticed in him after, one thing you admire about them. This is the warm part, and the one people forget to write.
“Anna, I have known Dave for nineteen years and I have never seen him like this. He is calmer. He talks about the future.”
5. The toast (15 seconds)
Ask everyone to stand, tie it back to the story in one line, and name the couple. Then stop.
“To Dave and Anna. To the lap-eleven lesson: the right person will wait for you, and then tell you to come in. To the bride and groom.”
A full example speech
The whole sample, 440 words, 3 minutes out loud, is on the sample page. It is labelled as a sample: Dave, Anna and the best man are made up. Read it once for the shape, then put your own stories in the same five slots.
Five rules that keep it good
- Three to four minutes. Around 500 words. Time it out loud, not in your head. Nobody has ever complained that a best man speech was too short.
- Nothing the groom would not want his boss or her mother to hear. No exes, no stag do, no money, no drinking stories. If you have to ask, leave it out.
- One story, told in detail. A list of adjectives (“he’s loyal, funny, kind”) tells the room nothing. One lunch-for-a-pencil story tells them everything.
- Give the partner real time. Half the room is there for them. A speech that mentions the partner only in the toast lands flat.
- Read it out loud ten times. Print it in a large font. Pauses go where the laughs are, and you only find them by practising.
Three mistakes that sink a speech
- Opening with a joke from the internet. Everyone has heard it. Open with your name and the first true thing.
- Inside jokes. If only three people in the room will get it, cut it.
- Drinking before. One drink. The speech is 4 minutes; the bar is open all night.
If you have the stories but not the words
That is the whole service: you fill in a form with your stories about the couple, and we write the speech from them, in this structure, in 2 days, with one free round of changes. Nothing is made up and nothing you did not send goes in. $49 in the US, £39 in the UK (VAT included), A$75, C$65.
Want the full sample speech and the 5 rules by email?
We send the whole sample speech and the five rules of a good best man speech. A few short emails, then we stop. No spam.
Questions
- How long should a best man speech be?
- Three to four minutes read out loud, which is about 500 words. Time it by reading it aloud; most people speak at 130 to 150 words a minute at a wedding. Shorter is always fine.
- What is the structure of a best man speech?
- Five parts in order: who you are and how you know the groom; one story about him; what that story says about him; what the partner changed in him; the toast. Each part has a time in the template on this page.
- What should you not say in a best man speech?
- Exes, the stag do, drinking stories, money, jokes about the partner, inside jokes only a few people get, and anything the groom's grandmother should not hear. If you have to ask, leave it out.
- How do I start a best man speech?
- With your name, how you know the groom and for how long, in one or two sentences. Then go straight into your story. Do not open with a joke from the internet; the room has heard it.
- Can I pay someone to write my best man speech?
- Yes. On this site you send your own stories on a form and we write a 3 to 4 minute speech from them in 2 days, with one free round of changes. Nothing is invented, and you read it before the day.
Giving the father of the bride speech instead? The same four-part shape works, with a different first part: we write that one too, from your stories, for $49, in 1 day.
Get my speech written, $49 From your stories, ready in 2 days